Over the past few years I have been contacted by dozens of homeschooling moms in a panic because their soon to be ex-husband wants the kids in public school. While I am no expert I have seen a very clear pattern:
If the judge is asked to choose between a parent that is asking for a lot of societal supervision of children (as you would have in a public school) and another who is requesting no societal supervision of children (as you would see in homeschooling) they will almost always choose supervision. This means the judge will almost always choose the public schools over homeschooling.
Public schools are "normal". For a judge it is a safe choice. It is a choice that if a child were to be abused or to become a drug addict or even to die in a school shooting no one will question. Again, it is a safe choice for a judge to make. It isn't about you.
Public schools are "normal". For a judge it is a safe choice. It is a choice that if a child were to be abused or to become a drug addict or even to die in a school shooting no one will question. Again, it is a safe choice for a judge to make. It isn't about you.
Because of this the goal needs to be to settle the issue outside of the courts.
Most men want their soon-to-be-ex-wives to stop homeschooling for one or more of these three reasons:
1) They don't believe the mother capable of supporting herself and properly taking care of the children because she can't both work a 9-5 job and homeschool 9-5.
(Those families with the most traditional homeschooling styles have the hardest time with this issue. Families who have followed a more child led learning style can more easily prove homeschooling can take place anyway.)
(Those families with the most traditional homeschooling styles have the hardest time with this issue. Families who have followed a more child led learning style can more easily prove homeschooling can take place anyway.)
2) They don't believe the mother will keep them properly informed of the childrens progress (or lack of progress) and desperately want to make sure that there is some accountability because they love the children and want to make sure they have a good education.
3) They want CONTROL and think they will be able to manipulate more control from the public school than from the mother of the children.
Which of the above does your ex fall into?
How can you help soothe the worries?
What are you willing to do to prove your capability?
What are you willing to give in exchange?
General accommodations may include:
Offer quarterly progress reports and, perhaps, samples of work on an annual basis.
Offer to have annual testing by a third party.
Offer to create a blog of daily "happenings" with updates at least once a week.
Great post!
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